Monday, March 15, 2010

Lazy Parent=Good Parent?

Well maybe not LAZY, perhaps relaxed.

Most days, after I pick up my four year old son from preschool, we sit on the play ground and hang out with the other families. The kids run and play, us moms chat. It's one of the things I love about this preschool, the community.

Anyway getting off track...

As we chat, I listen to other moms talking about their kids after school activities, baseball, soccer, football, basketball, ect. I am silent for those chats. I am not such a fan of younger kids having after school commitments. Truth be told I was not such a fan of preschool in general, until I found this school. My thinking is that kids are only little and free for so long, why rush the responsibility and pressure?

My boys love to run and play in the yard. They play baseball, soccer, football, but at their own pace and when they feel like it. This laid back approach to parenting has kinda always left me feeling at odds with other busy parents. I wondered, am I being lazy? Is this lack of scheduled activities hurting my kids?

Then a friend sent me this link and my parenting philosophy was vindicated!

I love the manifesto at the end! Yes, some of it is tongue in cheek. Parenting is hard, but it doesn't have to that hard. If we play our cards right, it can be pretty freaking fun.

****Edited to add:
Check out the comments section for some more awesome anti-over-scheduling points.

On another happy note, I started read a new blog a few weeks ago and her "happy pipe" style of living has really started to have an effect on me, if you haven't read Enjoying the Small Things, start now. I am not linking to her to kiss her ass or add to her gazillion followers, because she doesn't need it. But really, we all need a little more happy in our lives and every time I read it, I feel happier, more appreciative of my family, and pretty much all warm and fuzzy.


Ashlee said...

I feel the exact same way. I love that they have this time to just be little and I'll be sad to see it go.

My Bottle's Up! said...

this was such a refreshing read. :)

Miss Britt said...


Not only that - but I'm not sure it's GOOD for kids to see that their parent's lives become 100% about getting them to and from all these activities. And then we wonder why people grow up with an overwhelming sense of entitlement.

Tiffany said...

Ditto! At that age, my belief is that most of these activities are for the parents' enjoyment and not the kids.

mom2nji said...

I agree about that, maybe when they are 13 or 14 I will be shuttling them around from place to place, at 4 or 5 hell no.

That is true as well! I can't tell you how many times, I hear, "little Timmy doesn't TRY to hit or catch the baseball, he just wants to run around and play" well no SHIT? He is FOUR!

mom2nji said...

Thanks Ashlee and Nic!

Anonymous said...

I'm lazy and will continue to be so! This allows me and the babies total freedom & flexibility. I think free time adds to imaginative growth and creativity, anyway!

Life with Kaishon said...

I saw your comment today at Becca's post about her camera : ) and I loved what you said! I love that you are rocking your point and shoot. I think that is vital : ) The best photographers I know learned to rock their point and shoot before they got a big fancy schmancy dslr : )

I also love Enjoying the Small things. When I first read it I thought it was the best thing ever. I cried and cried. And prayed and prayed! i love that she is doing something big and gigantic just by embracing this and talking about it. Beautiful. SO nice to meet you today.

Your boys are SO cute. Oh. My. Gosh!

Life with Kaishon said...

PS And about your post : ) I love that philosophy! Who needs classes and teams when you are 4? Free play is the best play in my opinion.

Life with Kaishon said...

PSS Was your picture the one today at I heart faces of the three boys that I said I LOVED? How great is it to meet you again : )

I hope I didn't sound psychotic in all my comments.

Woo222 said...

You are so right! Taking time to enjoy and relax is SO important and I think you're setting a great example for your boys. I bow to your parental wisdom. I hope I'm that wise when I have kids. If I'm not, please slap me. :)