Back in the early years of our marriage, before we were blessed with the kiddos, our house was immaculate.
I was neurotic.
Our bathroom towels were tied with raffia bows. I folded the end of the toilet paper into a triangle. Really I did. Everything was shiny and clean.
And it stayed that way even after Noah came along. I don't even remember when I stopped tying little bows on the towels or stopped bothering to put the damn toilet paper on the roll (screw folding the ends). I just ran out of energy for things like that after I got pregnant with Jordan. Then I was put on bed rest and it all fell to crap. The house was a mess and I couldn't fix it. After he was born it just stayed that way.
Fast forward, Isaiah came along and we moved into a new house. I was determined for it to be a new start. Neil and I both were super on top of the household chores. The house stayed perfect for about a year. And in that time I noticed, I was freaking miserable. I didn't want to let the boys make crafts. I freaked over the littlest mess. I was the yelling, screaming mom I never wanted to be.
I had to let go a little. There is a difference between disaster and lived in.
Today I spent all morning cleaning. The house was pretty clean ie, the bathroom did not smell like a truck stop (that's something no one warns you about with a house of boys, they miss the toilet, A LOT). As soon as they got home from school the tornado began and I found myself freaking out and yelling.
I have friends with perfect houses and they seem pretty sane. But I just don't think I am cut out for that. Is it wrong to think that a immaculate house is not worth the stress?
Do you stress over the little messes? Do you have kids and still manage to tie bows on your towels? If you do, please tell me what you secret is! Or what meds you are on.
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6 comments:
I'm with you - I can't seem to keep up, and when I do attempt to keep an order around here, I turn into the mom I don't really want to be (the stressed out, yelling one similar to the one you were referring to). I think I just need to accept that there will come a time when I WILL keep a neat, orderly house again. It might not be for years and years, but it WILL happen. I would like to know how all those other moms do it (I'm thinking they have secret cleaning people they don't tell anyone about hehehe).
Jenni, I feel your pain. As long as the house is clean (meaning the actual disinfecting), I try not to let the stuff everywhere get to me. Try to remember your spotless house before you had kids and then imagine being there again - no kids there! Wouldn't you rather have a house full of happy children?
Your posts always make me laugh. After you have kids, I think some things you have to decide to "get over". I like for my house to be clean. But..when I had my two youngest running around in diapers with the older one not much older some things I did before just had to give. Now that they are older..7, 8, and 12 they HELP. I don't have to do it all by myself. So on the days it needs to be done, no one gets to do anything "fun" until the house is cleaned up as a team effort. They may not do it perfect but they have to learn. Also, they don't get their computer time or fun time in the day until they have done the daily chores (make beds, pick up clothes,empty dishwasher, and so on..)Sometimes it's easier and neater to do it myself but when I do that, I'm not teaching them anything and they don't appreciate things being done. A little cleaning fairy does not exist to my knowledge and I want them to know that. Anyway, hang in there. It sounds like you're doing a great job and you're a great mom!
lori
Thanks ya'll. Mine help too. They clean their rooms, put clothes in the right places, and even sweep and vacuum sometimes. That's part of the learning process too. Letting them do the jobs even if it's not perfect.
Bows on towels? For reals? I'm just happy if I can find a clean one without dog hair on it. I'm laughing over the toilet paper. Again, I'm just happy to finish up and discover that someone left a roll in the bathroom.
Today, I scraped dried boogers off the wall with a butter knife. Glamorous, no?
I gave up years ago too. 2 kids, 4 cats, full time job, I just can't keep up. And the housekeeping was the area that I chose to let go.
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