Friday, May 20, 2011

Oh Crap... I am Clueless

I have mentioned before that my middle son, Jordan, is by far my most sensitive child. He is easily hurt crushed by things my other two brush off. So when I went to pick the crew up from school today and saw two beaming faces above two HUGE bright foot necklaces, and one crestfallen face above no necklace, I knew I was going to have a problem.

The end of the year PE awards were given out. Isaiah (the youngest) was 1st place, fastest kid in the entire Kindergarten class. Noah given the 1st place prize for the ESE students (which let me say I LOVE that they didn't try to make him qualify with the other classes, it's just not fair). And Jordan was 5th place for ALL of second grade. Which in my opinion ROCKS since until this year he was crippled with severe asthma and is still working on his lungs.

The hard part? 5th place didn't get a cool necklace, they just got two charms. He was heartbroken. He really worked his butt off this year, I know he did, he came home sweaty and exhausted every track day. He feels like a failure and that his hard work was for nothing. Which to me, is nuts! It means that with the exception of 4 kids he was the fastest! With my asthma I was always LAST.

I feel helpless. I want to praise them all and tell them I am proud, but Jordan miserably says he doesn't deserve it. I snuggled, hugged, talked, and fought my own tears. He still cried.

Thank God daddy came home to save the day. He talked to him and they are going to train this summer so he can be even faster next year. Daddy made him a necklace out of all the charms he earned through out the year and it was almost as cool as his brothers. (the kids earn charms for meeting the amount of goal laps a week, they are hideous plastic feet, but are like gold to the kids)

He seems better now, but I was shaken. How do you handle it when some of your children succeed and others struggle? When some win a prize and the others dont?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I don't think I like the idea that they give special awards to kids with-in the top 3 or top whatever..that seems like it would inevitably cause hurt feelings and disappointment. What ought to be rewarded is effort and he clearly threw himself into it, despite being at a disadvantage with his asthma. He's lucky to have parents who are compassionate and creative about how to help him deal with this, cuz it really isn't fair. If I had to run ONE lap right now I'd collapse and probably never be able to get my butt off the ground again. :)